How To Build Self Esteem

Low Self Esteem
Low Self Confidence
Lack of Self Belief
Low Self Worth

stems from the information you have directly and subtly been taking in since you were young. Babies are not born with low self esteem. Like everything else, they are taught.

Therefore we could go as far back as your childhood to find clues as to why you don’t feel like the towering, majestic specimen that you were born to be! Perhaps your parents were more interested in pointing out all your flaws than your positive points. Maybe at school people were unkind to you or perhaps you have got together with a partner who would have been better left in the gutter than chosen and given permission by you to strip you of good feeling, hope, joy and your self worth.

But whatever clues exist they are not a valid reason to continue on with low self esteem if you really don’t want it featuring in your life. Like most things with a little effort it is changeable.

The Mindset!

Understand that we are whatever we CHOOSE to be. We are in charge of how we CHOOSE to perceive and react to things.

For example you can meet two people who have been molested as children. One who CHOOSES to use it to colour the rest of their lives, (it’s a harsh reality and a severe example, but it IS a CHOICE). Every new boyfriend or girlfriend therefore is solemnly sat down and told the back story of what happened and how it has affected the victim and in turn how it must now uncontrollably affect this newest relationship. The other person could be one of those people who say, ‘It happened. I moved on.’

Whilst making no judgement on either, these represent 2 very different perspectives, 2 very different perceptions, and therefore 2 very different outcomes.

The Mindset!

Change your perceptions.


It is you who DECIDES the importance that you give to a viewpoint or a person and what relevance they or their opinions should play in your life. Did it ever occur to you that is CHOICE? And that whilst we can’t help bad luck and whilst we are human and make mistakes, what we do after any event is OUR CHOICE? So DECIDE that people who helped to put you down are not worthy of the energy and respect you have been giving them.

Remember that by continuing with them in the same manner as before you are giving them permission to continue breaking down your self esteem, so DECIDE what changes you intend to make and plan it well.

The Mindset!

Take back control!


Take control of the information that you allow to nest in your mind! You’re the Boss! Edit out the rubbish. Treat it like an orange. Turf out the coarse skin, reveal the goodness and make use of only the fleshy, nutritious sweet bit.

To begin to reverse the negative patterns look for evidence from your past experiences that you are indeed fabulous. Find ONE great example right now! – At the very least STOP looking for evidence that everything about you is rubbish. It ain’t!

I know it is the easier to do. – Thinking negatively about oneself is the default setting for most of us, but it is what is keeping you stuck with low self esteem, making poor decisions and making even worse friends.

I KNOW YOU CAN DO IT!

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